Chapter Two:
It's another Monday morning. I wake up, look at the clock and see that it's 5:30 a.m. I doze off for a bit, fifteen minutes, actually. As I 'come to' again, I see my wife, Kathy, who had just gotten up, getting ready for work. That's cool. Usually she gets up later than this and leaves last minute for the drive to town, often even a little bit late. As I gather my thoughts, I think as to how I could say either, "Good Lord, Morning?" or "Good morning, Lord!" I decide on the latter. I've always tried to look at the positive side of things. But I'm also a bit of a realist as to how things aren't always what we'd like them to be, which can affect our mental outlooks.
I've made the decision that, as much as is within me, I'm going to trust the Lord for a great day. I already know that there are situations that can challenge that. There is a funeral service for a close friend of ours from church who died unexpectedly in a violent car crash. He was up in Iowa on a business trip when the accident happened. No one knows whether this was caused by a heart attack, an error in judgment or something else. But whatever the cause, we have lost a great, gentle giant whose love and devotion for the Lord is unquestionable, leaving a positive impact on all of us.
As I linger in bed for a few more minutes, communing with the Lord in prayer, I hear our adopted 15 year-old daughter, Samantha, in the kitchen, getting ready for school. It comes to my mind that I need to write her a note for school due to her missing a day of school for not feeling well. So I get up, write the note, discussing the upcoming events of the day, including picking her up from school midday for the funeral. It's a cool, crisp fall morning, still dark, so I decide to drive her to the bus stop, at the bottom of our hill.
My mind goes back to how when Samantha and her brothers first moved in with us, nearly two-and-a-half years ago, she was quick to inform me that she didn't trust men. I was aware of an abusive history that she and her siblings had experienced. She, as a young female, had been exposed to more than a young girl ever should. So I assured her that I understood. I know that it would take some time for her to comes to grips with the trust issue. At that point in her life, most of the men in her life had been perverts or violent types, resulting in constant danger to her, escalated by the men's drug and alcohol abuse. She had learned to guard and protect herself, forming the opinion that men, young and old, alike, are simply not to be trusted. So I realized that if I had been exposed to what she had, I would feel the same. As time went on, Samantha has come to grips with this issue. There will always be points of caution in her heart and mind, as there should be. However Samantha and I have become very close as dad and daughter. She's my girl. We love each other and she knows that she is safe and secure. She does well in school, relates well with others and seems quite mature in her understanding in a variety of areas.
So, having gotten Samantha on her school bus, I realize that it's time to wake up the rest of the kids. My adopted sons, Jesus, 12, and Cypress, 11, need to get up and ready before it gets too late. As I call them, Jesus gets up and begins to get ready. Cypress dozes back off to sleep. I wake up our 11 year-old foster daughter, Gabrielle. She doesn't like to get up any better than Cypress, but she does OK this morning. Cypress isn't as easy to get up. Finally, I take in a squirt bottle of water that we use to keep the cats off of our counter tops. A light spray prompts him to get up. As Kathy goes out the door for work, I monitor breakfast and medications for each of the kids. It's daylight now so they can walk together to the bus stop.
Nearly two-and-a-half years ago, when the kids first came to us, both Jesus and Cypress had been diagnosed with ADHD and are both still on medication. This effects them in a variety of ways, due to limited ability to stay focused on tasks and being overly hyper. Jesus was struggling with a speech impediment and was overweight. His foster dad told us that Jesus sounded like he came from New York City, rather than New Mexico, due to his being unable to pronounce words with the letter "r" in them. He was a special education student. As of today, his speech is normal. He has slimmed down to a normal weight, mostly due to a change in his medication. Jesus likes to please people. That is in his favor as it results in his trying hard to be successful in completing chores and other tasks, at home or in school. One of Jesus' seventh grade teachers seems to have taken a special interest in him. She feels that he is doing so well that he should no longer be in special education classes. I agree. He's becoming a fine young man. Now if I can just get him and his brother to keep their room clean and picked up, I would be happier. But I realize that they are typical young boys and we love them as they are.
Cypress has been a cute boy, with a smile that seems to allow him to get away with much more than he should. This morning, as the kids were ready to go out the door to catch the school bus, I decide to do a quick back pack search. As I do so, I find that Cypress is attempting to sneak a "Game Boy" to school. I remove it, reminding him of the importance of being obedient and honest. He has been struggling in school and we are working close with his teacher and the principle in a concerted effort to keep him focused on the right things and keep out of trouble. Kathy and I have noted as to how Cypress is dealing with issues that Jesus was a year ago. Jesus is doing much better. And we are reminded that Cypress has come a long way, too.
Interestingly enough, the Lord has given us a deep, abiding love for each of the kids. We see that they have responded well to our love, and have bonded very well with us. As time has gone one, they have become increasingly distant from the influence and the effects of the past. We encourage them to keep in contact with those family members who are loving and decent people. We intentionally provide opportunities for them to do so. When the kids first came to us, we learned that they had not seen their grand parents in a long time. So we contacted them and got the kids together with the grandparents as quickly as we could. Everyone was overjoyed and acted as though we'd given them the winning lottery numbers! Family is important. In fact, we took them to an uncle's wedding last weekend. Their blood relatives have gone out of their way to express their gratitude toward our willingness to reunite the kids with them. We feel that this is what the Lord would have us to do and trust that this is teaching the kids a valuable lesson on the importance of maintaining positive family relationships.
Kathy and I both thoroughly love and appreciate our adoptive kids. We also enjoy the privilege of sharing our love with various foster kids who come to us, from time to time. I can honestly say that of all of the things that I have been involved in over my lifetime, that taking in these kids stands as one of the most important and rewarding things that I've ever done. Even in trying times, I have absolutely no second thoughts or regrets over fostering and adopting these kids. Kathy and I both love them dearly. It now seems as though they've always been with us. We can't imagine life without them. They are precious gifts and we thank the Lord daily for each of them!
It's another Monday morning. I wake up, look at the clock and see that it's 5:30 a.m. I doze off for a bit, fifteen minutes, actually. As I 'come to' again, I see my wife, Kathy, who had just gotten up, getting ready for work. That's cool. Usually she gets up later than this and leaves last minute for the drive to town, often even a little bit late. As I gather my thoughts, I think as to how I could say either, "Good Lord, Morning?" or "Good morning, Lord!" I decide on the latter. I've always tried to look at the positive side of things. But I'm also a bit of a realist as to how things aren't always what we'd like them to be, which can affect our mental outlooks.
I've made the decision that, as much as is within me, I'm going to trust the Lord for a great day. I already know that there are situations that can challenge that. There is a funeral service for a close friend of ours from church who died unexpectedly in a violent car crash. He was up in Iowa on a business trip when the accident happened. No one knows whether this was caused by a heart attack, an error in judgment or something else. But whatever the cause, we have lost a great, gentle giant whose love and devotion for the Lord is unquestionable, leaving a positive impact on all of us.
As I linger in bed for a few more minutes, communing with the Lord in prayer, I hear our adopted 15 year-old daughter, Samantha, in the kitchen, getting ready for school. It comes to my mind that I need to write her a note for school due to her missing a day of school for not feeling well. So I get up, write the note, discussing the upcoming events of the day, including picking her up from school midday for the funeral. It's a cool, crisp fall morning, still dark, so I decide to drive her to the bus stop, at the bottom of our hill.
My mind goes back to how when Samantha and her brothers first moved in with us, nearly two-and-a-half years ago, she was quick to inform me that she didn't trust men. I was aware of an abusive history that she and her siblings had experienced. She, as a young female, had been exposed to more than a young girl ever should. So I assured her that I understood. I know that it would take some time for her to comes to grips with the trust issue. At that point in her life, most of the men in her life had been perverts or violent types, resulting in constant danger to her, escalated by the men's drug and alcohol abuse. She had learned to guard and protect herself, forming the opinion that men, young and old, alike, are simply not to be trusted. So I realized that if I had been exposed to what she had, I would feel the same. As time went on, Samantha has come to grips with this issue. There will always be points of caution in her heart and mind, as there should be. However Samantha and I have become very close as dad and daughter. She's my girl. We love each other and she knows that she is safe and secure. She does well in school, relates well with others and seems quite mature in her understanding in a variety of areas.
So, having gotten Samantha on her school bus, I realize that it's time to wake up the rest of the kids. My adopted sons, Jesus, 12, and Cypress, 11, need to get up and ready before it gets too late. As I call them, Jesus gets up and begins to get ready. Cypress dozes back off to sleep. I wake up our 11 year-old foster daughter, Gabrielle. She doesn't like to get up any better than Cypress, but she does OK this morning. Cypress isn't as easy to get up. Finally, I take in a squirt bottle of water that we use to keep the cats off of our counter tops. A light spray prompts him to get up. As Kathy goes out the door for work, I monitor breakfast and medications for each of the kids. It's daylight now so they can walk together to the bus stop.
Nearly two-and-a-half years ago, when the kids first came to us, both Jesus and Cypress had been diagnosed with ADHD and are both still on medication. This effects them in a variety of ways, due to limited ability to stay focused on tasks and being overly hyper. Jesus was struggling with a speech impediment and was overweight. His foster dad told us that Jesus sounded like he came from New York City, rather than New Mexico, due to his being unable to pronounce words with the letter "r" in them. He was a special education student. As of today, his speech is normal. He has slimmed down to a normal weight, mostly due to a change in his medication. Jesus likes to please people. That is in his favor as it results in his trying hard to be successful in completing chores and other tasks, at home or in school. One of Jesus' seventh grade teachers seems to have taken a special interest in him. She feels that he is doing so well that he should no longer be in special education classes. I agree. He's becoming a fine young man. Now if I can just get him and his brother to keep their room clean and picked up, I would be happier. But I realize that they are typical young boys and we love them as they are.
Cypress has been a cute boy, with a smile that seems to allow him to get away with much more than he should. This morning, as the kids were ready to go out the door to catch the school bus, I decide to do a quick back pack search. As I do so, I find that Cypress is attempting to sneak a "Game Boy" to school. I remove it, reminding him of the importance of being obedient and honest. He has been struggling in school and we are working close with his teacher and the principle in a concerted effort to keep him focused on the right things and keep out of trouble. Kathy and I have noted as to how Cypress is dealing with issues that Jesus was a year ago. Jesus is doing much better. And we are reminded that Cypress has come a long way, too.
Interestingly enough, the Lord has given us a deep, abiding love for each of the kids. We see that they have responded well to our love, and have bonded very well with us. As time has gone one, they have become increasingly distant from the influence and the effects of the past. We encourage them to keep in contact with those family members who are loving and decent people. We intentionally provide opportunities for them to do so. When the kids first came to us, we learned that they had not seen their grand parents in a long time. So we contacted them and got the kids together with the grandparents as quickly as we could. Everyone was overjoyed and acted as though we'd given them the winning lottery numbers! Family is important. In fact, we took them to an uncle's wedding last weekend. Their blood relatives have gone out of their way to express their gratitude toward our willingness to reunite the kids with them. We feel that this is what the Lord would have us to do and trust that this is teaching the kids a valuable lesson on the importance of maintaining positive family relationships.
Kathy and I both thoroughly love and appreciate our adoptive kids. We also enjoy the privilege of sharing our love with various foster kids who come to us, from time to time. I can honestly say that of all of the things that I have been involved in over my lifetime, that taking in these kids stands as one of the most important and rewarding things that I've ever done. Even in trying times, I have absolutely no second thoughts or regrets over fostering and adopting these kids. Kathy and I both love them dearly. It now seems as though they've always been with us. We can't imagine life without them. They are precious gifts and we thank the Lord daily for each of them!
So as spokespersons for the cause of foster care and adoption, we have first-hand, day-by-day experience. We never know what one day will bring and it is often totally unexpected. There are many complications. Overall, the rewards far outweigh the trials. When people ask us how we do it at our ages, I simply reply, "We don't know any better. We think it's great!" Yes, we do!
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